In divorce, as well as marriage, one saying always holds true: you have to pick your battles.  For most couples, overlooking annoyances and making compromises - even outright sacrifices - seem natural within the confines of marriage.  Unfortunately, the same cannot be said for divorce, where it's not uncommon for couples to fight for months, even years, over the most superficial issues.  Then again, some issues are not so trivial depending on the circumstances in your marriage.  Litigation over child support, for example, may be necessary in order to provide a child with a certain level of housing, education, healthcare and other basic needs.  On the other hand, refusing to settle unless you get the house, both cars and the furniture may come across as stubborn and spiteful behavior.

As you work through your divorce, you may be wondering what things are truly worth fighting for.  The answer is highly subjective, but the key is to think of long-term goals, rather than short-term needs and desires.  At the moment, it may seem like a good idea to keep the house, which is undoubtedly a valuable asset into which you've invested a lot of money.  However, if you were to think of all the costs associated with maintaining the house, even with alimony and child support payments, would you truly be able to afford the house year after year?  In this case, it may be better to sell the house and split the proceeds with your spouse, or exchange the house for other assets that you are better able to manage.

This is just one of many issues that may or may not be relevant to your marriage.  Deciding what's right for requires a careful examination of your financial and legal situation, as well as your personal life.  While it's natural to talk things out with family and friends, it's critical to seek objective, third-party advice from an experienced family law attorney.  A good attorney is going to tell you what you need to hear, as opposed to what you want to hear.  He or she will encourage you to negotiate your divorce through private methods such as mediation, which will save you time and money.  If going to court is the best option, he or she will give you the effective representation you need in order to make a convincing case in front of the judge.  It should be noted, however, that attorneys with extensive education and trial experience focus on keeping you out of the court system as much as possible.  In addition to helping you pick your battles, your attorney will suggest alternative arrangements that may be more palatable to you or your spouse.

If you are in need of reliable legal advice about alimony, custody, child support, property division, or any other issues that are relevant to your divorce, please speak with the family law attorneys of Villani & DeLuca, P.C.  Our attorneys look forward to advising you during a free initial consultation.